Anxious-Ambivalent Attachment style happens when caregivers give inconsistent responses and caregiving to a child. The caregiver is loving and attentive at times and unavailable and aloof at others.
For example, the child might
This pattern of behavior can cause the child to be confused and question whether they'll have their needs met. In addition, they have a hard time understanding what their caregiver's actions mean, resulting in extreme inner turmoil.
A relationship with an anxious-ambivalent person is characterized by mixed signals.
The person with this attachment style can get angry, frustrated, or upset with their partner. Still, they don't validate their feelings, so they end up feeling stupid because of them.
This self-judgment leads to the person not communicating their problems to their partner, causing issues and miscommunications in a relationship.
Moreover, these people feel insecure about their worth in a relationship, so they constantly need reassurance that they're loved and valued.
This intense insecurity can lead to clinginess and, at times, extreme jealousy and suspicion in their partner.
So, at the same anxious-ambivalent people deeply crave feelings of closeness and intimacy with their partner, they also struggle to feel like they can genuinely trust them.
Because of their constant worries and insecurities in a relationship, anxious-ambivalent people need to have constant reassurance from their partners that they're loved and valued.
This reassurance can be done in many different ways, but it must be consistent and truthful.
Validating your partner's feelings is also an essential step in leading them to a more secure attachment. Validating doesn't mean agreeing with everything they say. Instead, delicately point out evidence of you and your relationship's stability when your partner starts questioning it.
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